It started out like any other night. But I knew soon, it would all change in a matter of minutes. Like pulling off a band-aid, I didn't want to delay, I just wanted to get it over with. I stood tip-toe-ing on the balcony of my words, "Honey... I need to take a shower."
"What? You're going to take a shower before you work out?" my husband asked shocked.
"Yes. I haven't had a shower in two days and I can smell myself, I'm not going out in public like this. You don't know what it's like, you get a shower every day, sometimes two!" I rebuttled.
"Whoa Whoa Whoa calm down lady. You get a little emotional when you're p.m.s.'ing." he sneered.
"WHAT??!!!??" I shouted, "This has nothing to do with p.m.s. This has to do with me not having a shower in two days! I'll only be five minutes, geez!"
"Seriously hun, go for it. I. DON'T. CARE."
"Fine, I will then!" I said slamming the bathroom door. Inside I was thinking, 'He's totally right, I am crazy. Probably the kids fault.'
And then it happened. That magical moment I had been waiting for for two long days. I stood under the water letting it rush over my body. It was pure bliss. I wanted to be only five minutes, I did. Truly. But I was suddenly powerless to the abyss of happiness that ensued. Asher's cries were drowned out by the noise of the pipes running. It was as if my daughter wasn't even on the other side of that door anxiously waiting to sing me the song she made up today. I closed my eyes and took in the smell of Dove soap. Finally something clean smelling after all of the poop filled diapers, the dog farts, and spoiled milk in the corner. I looked down and watched it all swirling around my toes down the drain. Goodbye casserole. Goodbye smell from the subway. Goodbye stress. It practically melted off of me more and more every minute. I hummed a song from baby tv in my head, 'move like the animals, move like the animals, move like the animals do, waddle waddle waddle waddle with your arms down by your side, waddle to the water and slide slide slide....move like the animals move like the animals move like the animals do.' Catching myself, I laughed and wondered what songs I used to sing back in my wine and bathtub days. I knew time was running out as I stood there in all of my comfort and decided I probably ought to actually wash my hair. When I was finished I saw my razor sitting there and decided...what the heck...maybe I'll wear my capri's to volleyball. Just the majors though- pits and legs to the knee.
I reluctantly turned off the water and then the sounds of reality started coming back.
On the other side of that door... was the world in which I joyfully live my life for 23 hours and 45 minutes every day. But this... this magical place... this is mine. If only for a minute.
